Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Day 504-Forty Days until the ride...I have lost motivation!


I have to admit. I am in a rut right now. I am feeling pretty overwhelmed by a lot of things going on in my life. And perhaps that has stressed me out enough that I don’t feel like eating right, and I am low on motivation to ride my bike.

This is not a good thing literally a month before I go to Japan. Over the past 6 weeks, it seems like I am on course, and then I fall of the wagon for a week. I get on course again for a week, and then fall off the wagon. So far this week, I have fallen off the wagon again. I have not eaten clean, and I have just rode my bike for the first time in about a week. It’s been hot, it’s been raining, it’s been busy---are all good excuses. But I could push through those walls if I wanted to.

I am not totally discouraged because I’ve been here before and I know that I can get out of the hole, but I am feeling discouraged over the fact that I may not even hit 100 pounds lost by the time I get to Japan. This is a big failure to me, and I have 6 weeks to turn it around.

This week I’m not feeling excited about riding to Mount Fuji. I feel like I’m heading to the dentist. You know how that feeling is. I want to feel excited, pumped up, and feeling like I will absolutely do this.

I think with a very busy schedule, traveling out of town, working hard at church, holidays with tempting food, etc., etc., all my motivation is gone at the end of the day. And at the beginning of the day, I’m already overwhelmed. I have 4-5 weekends left to really do some big rides. Japan has come too quick. Reality is facing me, and the goals and aspirations I envisioned, are not as easily obtainable as I thought. Sometimes making moment-to-moment decisions to not eat this, or to go ride my bike, can’t be sustained over the long haul.

Have I given up? No, but I need to find a big pocket of motivation to help me through this slump. I thought that the closer I would get to Mount Fuji, the easier it would be to stay motivated. I’m feeling the opposite right now.

Help!

3 comments:

  1. getting and maintaining motivation is the tough part. Consider trying this exercise. An addiction is just a strong habit. It is all about wanting to change behavior by changing our thinking about a subject.

    http://www.smartrecovery.org/resources/library/Tools_and_Homework/Quick_Reference/cba_fourquestions.htm

    http://www.smartrecovery.org/resources/library/Tools_and_Homework/Quick_Reference/CBA_Worksheet.pdf

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  2. Hey Don,

    I'm not sure what advice I could offer - as you know, there's no real quick-fix.
    As you already said, you just have to "push through it".
    That said, just because you're not moving forward doesn't mean you should let yourself go backwards - instead, just try to "hold ground", if you know what I mean.

    Another technique that is sometimes useful, is by "not giving yourself a choice". Sometimes the mental skirmish of "Should I? Or shouldn't I?" can be the most tiring aspect; even if you manage to make the right choice, you could end up drained just from the decision making process. If you can somehow play a mental trick on yourself, or modify your situation in such a way as to remove the decision in the first place, so that it's "just something that has to be done", rather than "something you have to convince yourself to do every time".
    As an example, the strongest I have ever been on the bike was a few years ago, after going through some life changes, when I found myself pretty much broke! I was doing two shifts at work, and work was 12 miles away - I would ride in to work in the morning, then ride home for lunch. I'd ride back later in the afternoon, and finally ride home at night - I couldn't afford to catch the train, and I ended up having to ride nearly 50 miles every day. Man, I was strong back then. But now that "life is good", and the train is so convenient... I'm nowhere near as strong as I was then. There were even times when I would get back home from work at night, and suddenly remember, "Oh, I forgot to buy (such and such)", and I would immediately head back out - 8 miles each way - to the specialty shop. In short, almost every time I left the house, if it was further than walking distance, I was on my bike! With practically no money for luxuries, like train tickets, I basically had no choice.

    Of course, I understand that that's not practical most of the time, especially when it is wicked hot, and/or it's raining, etc. Anyway, see if there are some tricks you can pull on yourself.
    In the meantime, just try and sit out the slump without letting it cause too much damage. You'll bounce back soon enough.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Travis! Your advice to hold ground has a lot of meaning. Many times I feel like an all or nothing guy. If I'm doing good, I'm 100%. But if I mess up with eating for a day or two, sometimes I just throw in the towel and wait for a clean start the next week.

      At the end of my "pity party" day today, I got on my bike after work and instead of biking home I started pedaling the opposite direction, not knowing where I would end up. The next thing I knew I was 15 miles up the road. It felt good to just jump on the bike and go. I kind of got the Forest Gump syndrome.

      I am going to make this last month the best month I can. I am discovering, thanks to some of your comments above, that motivation is about just doing it, whether you want to or not. I have to hit 100 pounds lost...Today I weighed in at 290lbs. I know about 5 pounds of that is inflammation that will come off fast. So, if I'm going to hit 100 pounds lost, I have to be weighing in at 265.4lbs in 6 weeks! We'll see. Thanks Travis!

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